Women’s History Month - Not Your Average Mai Spotlights
As we celebrate the complicated history of the centennial of the 19th Amendment, we know just how important it is to share our Hmong stories and narratives. In this spirit, we are highlighting these phenomenal Hmong sisters who are “not your average Mai’s” and their work in moving our community forward.
Katie Lee Yang
I got married to my husband after I graduated high school when I was 18 years old. I don’t know if it was the right or wrong decision to marry that early in life, but I had to grow up really fast so it felt normal to me. Becoming a military spouse brought me to places I never imagined going, and taught me things I would’ve never experienced. We lived in places from Hawaii to Maryland with no nearby family or Hmong community - so we had to form our own families and communities. While I worried for my husband’s safety, I also had to make a life on my own and raise my children during long periods of time without him. I’ve had the highest of highs and lowest of lows during those long time periods, but it taught me resilience and tremendous growth. I figured, if I already reached my lowest point in life, the only way was up.
I’ve always been a proud mother to my beautiful children and a proud marine wife, but can now add that I’m a graduate student and resident teacher. Being a mom taught me that our children are truly the future, and it’s my honor and responsibility to enrich the minds of so many children in need of nurture and knowledge.
Katie Lee Yang is a graduate student at the University of St. Thomas' School of Education and graduates from their Teaching Program in May 2020
Pachoua Lor
What’s the most adventurous/courageous thing you’ve ever done?
The most adventurous/courageous thing I've done was move away for college. I grew up in a very sheltered home. My mother was strict, so I rarely left the house without her. When I was accepted to UC Berkeley, I was excited to finally venture out into the world. However, transitioning from my house in Fresno to the bustling city of Berkeley was a huge culture shock. I saw so many things, good and bad. There was no longer any filter of the world for me. I met some of the most amazing individuals who I believe will be my lifelong friends. Together, we went on crazy adventures out of state and even out of the country. I also began my journey of adulting. I learned how to handle bills, people, and difficult situations. If I hadn’t gone away for college, I would not be who I am today.
Women make history in their own ways everyday. Please share with us a personal story about you that you think reflects who you are, and/or your values.
My family was part of the last wave of Hmong people who immigrated to the United States from Thailand in 2004. When we arrived, we were faced with a mountain of barriers. Among them, language barrier was the most worrisome. My mother couldn't understand or speak English. She was a single mother with two young children in a foreign country. Throughout my childhood, I translated for her. My mother looked to 8-year-old me for understanding of government papers sent to us regarding government assistance, though all I could speak was broken English. Because I am her bridge, I pushed myself to learn English while retaining my Hmong language. I push myself when I feel incompetent because I want to be the person that my mother can depend on. My journey is more than mine alone.
What’s your hope for the future of Hmong women/women in general?
In my parent's generation, a man is powerful if his wife comes to him at his beck and call. Such a wife is deemed a good wife, which adds to the family reputation. In my generation, I see a rise in women that my parents' generation would deem ill-mannered and ignorant of one's place. I found power in these women who did not care about fitting into the acceptable norm. For the future of Hmong women, I hope that we continue to take up space and have the courage to be so bold that we overturn the gender roles placed on us by our culture and society. I hope we have the strength to stand together and support one another in reclaiming our voices.
Pachoua Lor is from Fresno, CA and affiliated with the Hmong Student Association at UC Berkeley
Abbie Lee
What do you wish people knew about you?
I am complex, changing every day, sensitive, strong but often tired.
Women make history in their own ways everyday. Please share with us a personal story about you that you think reflects who you are, and/or your values.
Given the extraordinary times we are living in, I have been thinking a lot about the stories we need to create change. As a public health professional, this global pandemic is of course tragic, but it is also a significant reminder of how flawed our systems are for the poor, the displaced, the oppressed, the marginalized, the underrepresented, the under-supported. Last week, after a long stretch of COVID-19 emergency work, I decided to make a trip to the grocery store for some food for the week or two ahead. As I made my way through the strange bare aisles, I of course observed frantic shoppers with their packed carts, quickly snagging whatever was on the shelves. But I also observed a handful of individuals and families carrying fairly empty baskets discussing the practicality of what was left on the shelves and whether they would be able to afford the supplies still available. It enraged me. I myself had to make purchase compromises reflective of this scarcity for some and not for others. I suspect that too many people are experiencing this or if lucky, now clearly just seeing the inequities that ultimately impact our health.
By my definition, being Hmong means having shared compassion for those who are suffering. This tense time has brought out more of that identity in me and underscored why I fight for equity and rights to health.
What’s your hope for the future of Hmong women/women in general?
I hope we can forgive ourselves more often. Like many young Hmong girls, I grew up with the expectation of perfection. Over many years (and lots of therapy), I’ve learned that chasing perfection made me miss a lot of the details that are important to actually supporting my community. Rather than ruminating over past mistakes, I’ve found it more helpful to forgive myself and study the barriers I faced or have overcome. Yes, we should be critical of our actions. Yes, we should hold ourselves accountable for participating in the flawed systems we’re a part of. But forgiving ourselves helps us uplift others, allows us to practice different approaches, and gives us the food we need to move through tough times.
What’s the most adventurous/courageous thing you’ve ever done?
About a year and a half ago, I packed what I could into my family’s Toyota Corolla and drove across the country to start a new job serving a community in Oregon that I’d never visited, where knew almost no one, and where I’d likely be the lone Hmong person in most every single space.
The need to be stimulated by new and challenging experiences has always motivated me, as it did when I decided to make this move. I knew the toll it would take on my parents, my siblings and the rest of my family with being so far away. And it has rendered a deep feeling of guilt that I am certain many of my fellow Hmong womxn know too well. However, I grapple with it in knowing that since then, I’ve grown significantly. I’ve learned about what hurdles I can handle on my own versus what hurdles I need support for. I’ve learned how to voice what I know to be true and right in a room full of people who may oppose. I’ve learned how to build a whole new community of people that I trust. I’ve learned what my limits are and what they are not. It’s been a remarkable journey and I plan on continuing to be adventurous and courageous.
Abbie is affiliated with the University of Minnesota School of Public Health, University of Minnesota Health Equity Network, University of Wisconsin - Madison Chancellor’s & Powers-Knapp Scholarship Alumni, American Public Health Association, and Oregon Public Health Association
Zoua Yang/𝘡𝘶𝘢𝘨 𝘠𝘢𝘫
This spotlight features Liz and Monica's grandma (their 𝘯𝘪𝘢𝘮 𝘵𝘢𝘪𝘴), Zoua Yang/𝘡𝘶𝘢𝘨 𝘠𝘢𝘫. Over time Monica and Liz have had opportunities to speak with her about her life, and her greatest achievements and regrets. This snippet includes what she is most proud of.
Born on April 8, 1950, Zoua Yang started to learn how to make fabric out of hemp plants at 13-14 years old from her mom. Once she learned how to manipulate the plant fibers and learned how to spin yarn from the fibers, she made her own fabric (𝘯𝘵𝘢𝘶𝘣 𝘮𝘢𝘫) at the beginning of each year. They did this because her family, like many other Hmong farming families, were too poor to buy fabric. She said,
“We started this process and made clothes every day of the year. If you were too slow to sew, you wouldn’t have enough outfits and clothes ready for the 10-day new year celebration at the end of the year. This is why we worked on our fabrics and clothes every day throughout the year. We never sewed it to sell, but sewed these clothes for ourselves.
Second, despite being poor, I’m grateful and proud that I was able to bear a few children, who’ve been able to have grandchildren like you and Liz. I lost my daughter Mailee, your mom’s older sister, because we didn’t have enough money for food to feed her. I lived with my in-laws at the time and they never wanted to share their food with us. At that time, your grandpa was teaching in Long Cheng so I lived alone with them and your mom’s sister. We didn’t have enough money for food and medicine and your grandpa rarely got paid and lived in Long Cheng so it was really hard and sad. Your mom’s sister got sick (𝘳𝘢𝘶𝘨 𝘥𝘢𝘣 or 𝘯𝘦𝘦𝘨 𝘵𝘴𝘰 𝘥𝘢𝘣 𝘵𝘰𝘮) and since we didn’t have enough money to buy nutritious food or medicine to cure her illness, she passed away as a young child. She lived to about 3-4 years old before she passed. Losing her was my biggest regret. Which is why I’m so grateful and proud of the children I had that were able to survive. Despite being poor and despite now being widowed, I'm proud to have had all my children and proud to have made a life in America. I'm grateful the opportunity to come to America to give all my children a better life here. If I remained in Laos, I would've never made it. I'm proud that my children have given me grandchildren to love and support me, even though my husband is no longer here.”
After fleeing war-torn Laos to the jungles like thousands of other Hmong refugees, Zoua and her family were on the run for three years before they made it to the Thai refugee camps in 1978. Her and her husband, Thomxai Lor. had her two infant children in tow. Then Zoua and her family (Liz and Monica’s mom, and her 2 sons and 2 daughters) finally arrived in Spokane, WA in December 1985, a decade after the end of the Vietnam War. She now has a total of 8 children, and resides in Wausau, WI with her son, daughter-in-law, and 2 grandchildren.
*Fun Fact: Even though Zoua never received any formal education and had no teacher, she taught herself how to read and write in the Hmong RPA language. Becoming literate in Hmong was one of her greatest achievements.
Nancy Xiong
What do you wish people knew about you?
I think a lot about food. My meals also have to be proportionate. For example, if I'm eating a sandwich and the bread-to-meat to veggie ratio is off -- get that sandwich out of here! JK, I'll still eat it but it can be better.
What’s the most adventurous/courageous thing you’ve ever done?
I spent some time couch surfing by myself through Europe after college. It was also my first time abroad and it was life changing for me.
Women make history in their own ways everyday. Please share with us a personal story about you that you think reflects who you are, and/or your values.
While driving back to Sacramento after visiting my parents in Atwater, I listened to a TED Talk featuring Reshma Saujani where she advocates that we ought to ”teach girls bravery, not perfection” (https://bit.ly/2QYSDKt). She describes how socializing young girls to strive for perfection and not make mistakes, indirectly or directly discourages them from taking risks and challenging the status quo. She makes the case that instead of discouraging or punishing girls from making mistakes—we should applaud them for taking chances and to help them feel comfortable with imperfection. One example she uses to describe the macro effects of socializing is how men and women approach job applications. She describes a “report found that men will apply for a job if they meet only 60 percent of the qualifications, but women, women will apply only if they meet 100 percent of the qualifications. 100 percent.” That moment hit me like a train. You see, I had just accepted a new job a week prior and I was getting ready to transition into it. I turned to my partner and said, “oh my god, I think I settled.” I reflected on my job search and realized that I had only applied for positions that I felt I was qualified or even over qualified for. I had unknowingly limited my own ambitions. It was in that moment that I knew that I wanted more for myself and I needed to be my own advocate more than ever to get there.
What’s your hope for the future of Hmong women/women in general?
My hope for our future is that Hmong women are not afraid to take up space and leadership roles. They belong there as much as anyone else. Their vision for what they want to see in the world is just as important and definitely needed especially in this political climate. We can't afford to wait our turn any longer.
Nancy is affiliated with Hmong Innovating Politics (HIP)
Renee Ya
Women make history in their own ways everyday. Please share with us a personal story about you that you think reflects who you are, and/or your values.
I started working in the video game industry in 2004. I was the first Hmong woman to do so. I have since been working in the video game industry for nearly 16 years now and because of such, I have been able to chart a course that would enable more creatives to be able to follow in my foot steps. If nothing else, it's so important for me to be able to be a beacon in the darkness of uncertainty for our future endeavors, whether that is in the arts or beyond. Being a woman and mother in gaming is not easy but it is all worth it in the end to ensure that I take up space so that others feel welcomed.
What do you wish people knew about you?
I graduated from high school at 15 and graduated with my undergrad (BSBA) at 17. I have worked in the video game industry for the last 16 years including on game titles such as Dance Dance Revolution, Star Wars, and Final Fantasy (just to name a few).
What’s your hope for the future of Hmong women/women in general?
I hope that we can move through our lives without fear. Fear of failure, fear of disappointment, fear of the unknown. My hope is that we can truly feel comfortable in our skin knowing that we are enough and that we cannot and will not be weighed down by the unspoken traditions and expectations of our elders, peers, and community.
What’s the most adventurous/courageous thing you’ve ever done?
My biggest endeavor was co-creating CelebrateHmong (https://www.celebratehmong.com/) a program created by my company Tiger Byte Studios. Its mission is to create a space where aspiring, emerging, and established artists and creatives can connect and enable a network that gives back. From grants to mentorship to a 7-day long festival, it's been my life long dream and we accomplished so much in our first year (2019). I am incredibly excited for our second year as this year's theme for our multidisciplinary art & media festival will be about taking on envisioning our Hmong narratives in the future. “2020 Vision” acknowledges our history and aims to place us in a universe of our own design.
Why is it courageous? Because it asks us to take a step into the unfamiliar and uncomfortable. But I don't ask anyone to do it alone. I put myself and staff front-and-center so that we can lift each other up together.
Renee is affiliated with Tiger Byte Studios (Company) and Celebrate Hmong (Program)